Inner Demons
by Mempyisms
Summary: Your basic Hiead/Zero pairing. Complete and utter OOC-ness. Consider yourself **warned**


Author's Notes: Alright! **grins** I might make this a chaptered fic. **sweatdrop** Another, only-took-me-one-sitting-to-write thing.  
  
I'm so lazy, aren't I?  
  
ANYway, this, of course, will be a Hiead/Zero pairing...... ^_^  
  
OOC-ness involved, so consider yourself warned. I *tried* to keep them in- character.......  
  
Oh. **thumbs-up to D-chan** I got the very first line from you! ^_^ Thanks for introducing me to the word 'sadistic.'  
  
  
  
* * * *  
  
  
  
He smirked sadistically.  
  
"Bastard." The jeering word fell flatly from my lips.  
  
"Maybe so." Mussy, silvery-white locks framed his flushed face. "Demo..." He said, taking another step towards me. "....you're just as father-less as I am."  
  
My rage boiled over involuntarily. "I-I-I .......HATE YOU!!!" I nearly screamed, taking a swipe at his jaw.  
  
He easily, in one swift movement, caught my fist, and glared, those ruby eyes suddenly becoming clouded with hate. "I could say the same for you." And then I was laying on my back, rather painfully. "So don't think you're the only one."  
  
His lithe form stood, and strode away. Shock slowly registered within me, before indignation, and fury. I got up, harshly ignoring the slight streak of discomfort, and followed him, breaking into a fast run. "Goddamn you! Get back here!"  
  
Hiead Gner, however, made absolutely no sign of caring. So, without thinking properly, and without really even realizing what exactly the consequences, I raised a hand, bringing it down violently against the place where his shoulder and neck met. A fatal spot, indeed, for any human, if hit hard enough.......  
  
His body went lax, and I saw, almost horrified, as he impacted with the floor.  
  
I could have sworn time seemed to stop. And then......  
  
"HIEAD!!!"  
  
: : : : : :  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
I gazed down at his motionless face, the only thing causing me to believe he was still alive the gentle rising and falling of his chest. Again, a minute passed...........and again............and again........  
  
Absently, I reached over, and brushed back a wisp of silvery-white hair. His pink lips were parted slightly, barely. How long had I been there for? Two hours? No, longer. Maybe five.....ever since.......  
  
My mind reeled.  
  
How could I have done this?  
  
I could have broken his neck, snapped it instantly. His blood.....it might have stopped flowing to his brain if I hadn't managed the task of getting him to where I was now.......  
  
The doctor had said something earlier........what was it?  
  
That Hiead had been lucky? Yes, that was it. I felt like killing myself.  
  
Hiead had not been lucky! Not with me around! I had.......I almost....almost........  
  
I couldn't bare the thought. I needed to leave. Hiead........I had caused him plenty of trouble. He would hate me more when he awoke. He'd probably try to kill me. I couldn't blame him, though........  
  
Roughly pushing back my chair, I stood angrily.  
  
Not knowing just where I was heading, I left the room.  
  
: : : : : :  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Clay put a reasuring hand on my arm. "Zero......" he paused. "....you can't....do this....."  
  
"Do what?" I snapped, blue eyes betraying the anguish I held.  
  
He blinked, then stared me down, concerned. "You can't keep acting like...like...some sort of zombie! You have to eat, Zero! It's not healthy.......what you're doing........it's just...dangerous."  
  
I faced him violently, brown bangs falling into my eyes.  
  
"He's been in a coma for three weeks! THREE WEEKS!!!" I shouted. A dull ache peirced my heart; something that struck me a little more than the usual plain, dull ache; something more agonizing. "And you know what?!" My knuckles, no doubt, were white, a result of clenching them so tightly. "It's all my fault!"  
  
"Iie, Zero. Iie," the blonde youth whispered softly. "I know what happened......I know........that you didn't mean to......"  
  
"Mean to almost kill him?" I said nastily. "Iie........you're right....." My voice shook. ".....but I did......"  
  
I was dimly aware of a stinging eminating from my eyes and cheeks, and, reaching up, was surprised to find wetness. Tears......  
  
I was crying........  
  
In a flash, I scrambled through the cafeteria door, too embarassed and mentally broken to give a shit, and Clay just stood there, watching me go. "Zero....."  
  
: : : : : :  
  
Blindly, I ran. Past hallways, past other people, and all along, I doubt I even noticed them......  
  
And I didn't care. I just.....wanted to be dead........like Hiead nearly was........  
  
I had caused it....everything. But the worst; the very, most distressing thought was that of losing him......  
  
I burst into the place where I knew I needed to be: the infirmery.  
  
"Hiead...." Now, I was stricken dumb by the emotion in my voice. It was as if I hadn't even said the name voluntarily; like it had come from someone else's mouth, someone else's parched lips.  
  
I dropped to my knees beside his bed, where he lay asleep.....  
  
"Hiead...Gomen....gomen.......for...everything." Not a trace of reaction from his peaceful face showed to make the silent room less depressing. I heard, rather than felt, a cry escape me; a sob that seemed far away to my ears.  
  
"O-negai...o-negai wake up!" I grabbed a white, cold hand, holding it within my own. "Damn you....Hiead......wake up.......wake...." I gently shook his shoulders. "...up..."  
  
Several minutes passed, which dragged along like hours, until I released him, and then pushed back a lock of silver hair from his forehead.  
  
I smiled through the tears that burned my eyes; a smile that was so bitter and sad and full of pain. "I'm.....sorry. It's all my...fault. I'll make it up to you. You won't....." I swallowed a lump in my throat. "...ever have to see me again."  
  
Standing, my legs practically made their own way out of the infirmery, trodding to the room myself, Clay, and Hiead all shared. My heart hurt just thinking about him......  
  
I typed in some numbers for the entrance code, barely aware of what I was doing, my mind so caught up with sorrow and grief. Though, that same, sad and bitter smile tugged at my lips as I knelt down awkwardly at the drawer near my bed.  
  
Pulling, hastily, as pair of scissors from the depths of junk and old trinkets, I saw its metal surface gleam temptingly, invitingly. "Hiead..." I clenched, for the hundredth time that day, my eyes shut. "I promised....you would never have to see me again. I-I don't think....I could bear it if you hated me. D-demo, I know....you will when you wake up."  
  
Raising watery eyes up toward the ceiling, I did not feel the slight, momentary prick as I slashed my right wrist. "I-I.....don't deserve to live."  
  
And in another swift motion, both wrists were bleeding steadily. "F- for......forgive me, Hiead......Kizna.........Clay......I.....just can't burden your lives..."  
  
I sat there, hunched over, waiting intently while the life seeped from me........  
  
And I would have sat there, hunched over, until *all* the life seeped from me, if a strong arm hadn't suddenly wrapped around my waist from behind, and grasped the hand with the scissors tightly, roughly.  
  
"What the hell ......do you think you're doing?! Baka!" A voice shouted angrily, wildly.  
  
I was too weak to protest very loudly, but struggled against whoever had captured me. I wanted death, and the person was going to, surely, deprive me of such a luxery......  
  
The person whirled me around, but I closed my eyes, dizzy from the loss of blood. Obviously, it was a male, because he shook me. Hard. My head snapped forward and back many times.  
  
"Baka, baka, baka." The person whispered, over and over again. He now cradled my limp body, and I was almost laying upon the cold floor, every second coming closer and closer to the warm darkness.  
  
Yet...I still had not seen my savior..........  
  
I peeked up only to see blazing, ruby eyes gleaming at me.....  
  
  
  
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Author's Notes: Okay, okay, so there were definitely spelling errors. **shrugs** What can I say? I wrote this short fic in about one sitting as well.......  
  
I'll have to write the next chapter.......  
  
We can't very well leave this unfinished, now can we? **grins** 


End file.
